Thursday, September 30, 2010

Reflect

Whenever I hear or see this quote I get annoyed because it’s so true it hurts. You really should smile and be thankful of all the great things that have happened to you in the past. I mean, you feel like shit when the school year ends or you graduate, but you can look back and say, “Hey, I actually have people and things and places to miss. That my life was worthwhile with these people, and things, and being in these places.” You know, life is all about moving on to bigger and better things. But you should never ever forget where you came from.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Ten Things

1. i like you. a lot. a whole lot, like woah. and you don’t notice, which breaks my heart, but i don’t mind that because you make me happy enough just by being yourself to justify it all.

2. you’re a bitch and i hate you. that’s about it. you want to run me over and think i’m a home wrecker but i don’t give a shit because you’re ugly and jealous and i’ll always be better than you because i’m a descent person. i thought we could be friends and i wanted to, but you’re just too much of a hoe.

3. you’re a complicated little fucker.you know too much about me. like we be cool and all but you have a tendency to be bi-polar so i’m worried about getting so close with you because i feel like it’s going to come back to get me. you’re a chill person and not gonna lie you’re not completely unattractive. idk why i’m always drawn to you, i actually have no idea how i feel about you if i really think about it.

4. i wish i was nicer to you. i know i have major attitude and after i snap at you i like kick myself for it, but that doesn’t make it any better. you’re just like me, we’re essentially the same person so i know we’re bound to fight a lot and i honestly love you a bunch but you’re just really selfish and clueless and annoying. neither of us have any patience or spend enough time with eachother so i guess that’s just the way it is. i’m really sporry though.

5. thank you. i never say that to you because it’s a cliche, but just thinking of you like makes me smile. i love you more than bit, you make me happier because you love me back and there’s never a dissappointment, only history, good memories and lots of it. you know me more than anyone in the world and i don’t really have anything to say to you considering you can read my thoughts. stay safe!

6. you’re too cute. i’m jealous of you sometimes because of how cute you are. i like how open you are and how you’re heart is made of gold. i think the fun has only just begun and i’m really happy we’ve stood by eachother through it all. it’s funny how protective we are of eachother :D

7. i don’t even want to write a little thing about you, the last thing you need is more attention. you need to grow the fuck up, stop being fake and judgemental of people, and see a goddamn therapist, like really, you’re verging on spencer pratt status. not cool, stop messing with my bitch, i don’t play that game, nigg.

8. i’m mad at you. i’m mad at you for dissing my taste in music, since it’s like a personal thing that’s dear to my heart and when i tell you my favorite song if you could not make fun of it that would be nice. i’m mad at you for being a bitch to my best friend, my best friend, she’s like numero uno, so if you’re going to make her feel uncomfortable, then you need to go away. i’m mad at you for telling the girl i hate the most my biggest secret, like i really trusted you and told you the one and only secret i had, and you told my fucking enemy,cool. like i shouldn’t have trusted you in the frst place, but i did and you should have respected that and kept your mouth shut, i trust people too easily, bu you whould have known better. you’re really awkward.

9. you’re hilarious. you’re just a funny funny funny person. you’re a hottie with a body and a great friend. i like how good you are at messing with people. you’re a moody little man sometimes and a bit of a diva but i don’t think anyone can ever not love you.

10. i hope everything will be okay with you. in my head i’ve always seen you as indestructable and sarcastic and stubborn and funny and amazing, so seing you all quiet and grey and sad and imoble makes me want to cry. i guess i just never realised that people don’t stay healthy forever and these kinds of things are bound to happen, but it’s the most tragic thing to see your face so blank. we really need you to hold us together, so stay tough and i love you. you’re not going anywhere

Monday, September 27, 2010

Random

So, I think I should really stop everything before I end up hurting him. I don't even want to be with any guy right now or to even deal with any other guy actually. I think it's cause I love my self too much to even care about someone else other than myself. Ya what ever, I'm selfish but to be honest I am. I admit I'm a prideful person and I admit that my pride is the reason why most of my relationships end. Yet, I would rather take my pride than to lower it to someone who I don't even love that much and make myself look like a desperate person in front of everyone. NU UH! . I guess what I am trying to say is... YES my pride gets in the way of my relationships but I know someday when I find the right one, he will be the one who I will be willing to put my pride on the line. Meaning, I will be willing to do it without a heavy heart but also without getting mad at that person. And when that that day comes I will realize that I AM TRULY, MADLY and DEEPLY IN LOVE with this guy because he is the only one who I am willing to put my pride down to. But, I'm not hoping for this to even happen right now since I really need to focus on school first.

Friday, September 24, 2010

GOOD MORNING WORLD

Thursday, September 23, 2010

I'll keep you my dirty little secret.



Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Busy
Lately, I have been extremely busy. It's so weird how I mostly focus on school and I barely even have time to myself anymore. It's these kind of moments that I am thankful for the things that happened in the past and in my life right now. I knew from the start that once I get back home from the Philippines that I really needed to focus on school, but what I didn't expect was that my whole life has to be surrounded by school 24/7. That is why I am thankful for what happened because right now, I can't even find time for myself. What more if I had a boyfriend? haha. Life is just great right now other than school. Weekdays I stress about school but when the weekend comes all I do is P A R T Y. LITERALLY. It has just been so fun lately, well ever since I came back from the Philippines. I missed my friends sooo much and I realized that I will NEVER EVER go on a trip for that long EVER again. I sometimes find it funny how, God would put me in these tough situations but in the end he would show me the light at the end of the tunnel. I guess what I am trying to say is, life has just been amazing for me lately. AlI have to think about is myself and school.. but also my future. I am not even focused on dating someone just yet since I don't think I can even manage having a boyfriend right now ahah. But I find it funny how when ever one leaves another one takes their spot. Hmm.. I think God never wants me to be lonely?

Sunday, September 19, 2010

everyday I spend with you is the new best day of my life


Frustrated

OK so by now I would think that people has moved on with the issues from the past. Yet, people still manage to ask me questions on my formspring about stupid shit. I understand that anyone can ask you anything on there, but I don't understand why people have to constantly ask me questions about my past relationship. To be honest, it gets pretty annoying. I believe people should just move on and stop worrying about it. It has been about 3 months already.. I think? but anyways, my point is I hate how people ask me the stupidest questions just to make me react. But really, it doesn't because I have no reason to. If I really wanted to start drama I probably would have started it once I came back home from the Philippines but I didn't. I just want people to understand that what ever happened in the past is in the past. so JUST MOVE ON! ok?





Saturday, September 18, 2010

FEAR

NOTHING SCARES ME MORE

THAN MY FUTURE



Friday, September 17, 2010

It's not that I didn't care,
It's that I didn't know
It's not what I didn't feel,
It's what I didn't show




Thursday, September 16, 2010

Stressed.
I am mostly stressed about school and getting into
honor roll this year. I lost my chance getting into honor
roll last year and I felt extremely disappointed in myself.
So now, I am trying to redeem myself for the mistakes that
I made last year.
I have been considering to apply to a different
University other than U of S. The only thing that I fear
is being independent. Growing up, I never had to worry
about money or anything since I basically had everything
set for me; and now, the time has come when I can finally
make my own decisions.I always wanted to pursue the rest
of my schooling in the States but I have been having a
hard time trying to tell my mom. Well,my plan right now
is to study at the UofS until I get into medicine and
that is when I will consider moving to a different
University.


Wednesday, September 15, 2010


i CLEARLY have no life